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More Stress Management
How Vulnerable
Are You To Stress?
Mark from 1 (almost always) to 5 (never),
according to how much of the time each statement applies to you.
___ 1. I eat at least one hot, balanced
meal a day.
___ 2. I get 7 to 8 hours of sleep
at least 4 nights a week.
___ 3. I give and receive affection
regularly.
___ 4. I have at least one relative
within 50 miles on whom I can rely.
___ 5. I exercise to the point of
perspiration at least twice a week.
___ 6. I smoke less than half a pack
of cigarettes a day.
___ 7. I take fewer than five alcoholic
drinks a week.
___ 8. I am the appropriate weight
for my height.
___ 9. I have an income adequate to
meet my basic expenses.
___10. I get strength from my religious
beliefs.
___11. I regularly attend club or
social activities.
___12. I have a network of friends
and acquaintances.
___13. I have one or more friends
to confide in about personal matters.
___14. I am in good health (including
eyesight, hearing, teeth).
___15. I am able to speak openly about
my feelings when angry or worried.
___16. I have regular conversations
with the people I live with about domestic problems, e.g., chores,
money, and daily living issues.
___17. I do something for fun at least
once a week.
___18. I am able to organize my time
effectively.
___19. I drink fewer than three cups
of coffee (or tea or cola) a day.
___20. I take quiet time for myself
during the day.
___ SUBTOTAL - 20 = ___ TOTAL
To get your score, add up the figures.
Then, subtract 20. Any number over 5 indicates a vulnerability to
stress. You are seriously vulnerable if your score is between 25
and 55, and extremely vulnerable if your score is over 55.
________________________________________________________
Adapted from a test
developed by Lyle H. Miller and Alma Dell Smith at Boston University
Medical Center, www.stressdirections.com
More Details
on Supporting Yourself During Stress
Here is a more detailed explanation
of things you can do to support your ability to handle and recover
from stress.
·
Get
adequate sleep. Seven or eight hours minimum on a schedule regular.
More than an hour or so of difference in bedtime or waking can disrupt
your body's daily cycle. Your energy level may take several days
to recover. You may be used to operating on less sleep and an irregular
schedule, but you can't handle stress as well in this mode.
·
Get
some exercise every day (at minimum, 3 times/week, 20-30 minutes).
Choose an activity that you enjoy, not one that seems like a chore.
Exercise releases endorphins, natural chemicals promote calm and
contentment. Start slow if you haven't been exercising--walking
is a good starter. Exercise discharges stress tension from the body.
·
Eat
three or more small to medium meals on a regular schedule with good
nutrition, including fruits and
veggies, to maintain a balanced energy and coping level. Keep
your eating moderate and avoid any drastic diets, etc.
Take a standard multiple vitamin supplement to fill-in any nutritional
gaps. Drink a lot of water. Water assists the body in eliminating
biochemical waste.
· Take
care of your body by avoiding excess sugar, caffeine (coffee, cola,
tea), nicotine, alcohol, drugs, etc. All of these cause your system
to 'crash'. Even though some provide a temporary simulating or relaxing
effect, ultimately your energy level suffers. These substances take
more of a toll than you realize, until you have to handle stress.
Cut down gradually over a period of a week or so to prevent severe
withdrawal symptoms.
·
Learn
relaxation exercises or meditation (slow, deep breathing; imagine
pleasant scenes; tense & relax muscles) Listen to relaxing music;
read for pleasure. These activities decreases tension and help to
process stress reactions.
·
Maintain
your perspective. Sometimes how you look at things can greatly increase
or reduce their stressfulness. Keep an eye out for your unhelpful
and untrue thoughts. ("I just can't do this.") Think through
why these thoughts are incorrect and unhelpful. Then substitute
more correct/helpful thoughts. ("If I just take one thing at
a time, I'll accomplish my most important goals. But if I try to
think about or do everything at once, I'll get overwhelmed.")
If you don't substitute positive thoughts, the negative ones will
prevail.
·
Use
time management techniques to avoid becoming swamped. Make lists,
get a sense of accomplishment checking off tasks as you get things
done. If you can't stand to face a task, shift temporarily to another
priority, then tackle the unpleasant item when you feel stronger.
·
Be
sure to have an emotional outlet. Weddings are emotionally demanding.
Talk to others about the stress. (Everyone has or has had stress!)
In the press of activity we tend to put our emotional needs on hold.
Expectations for an upbeat mood can be difficult when we have other
feelings. Set aside time for yourself. Take special care to express
your "negative" feelings. Don't fall prey to the myth
that weddings only involve good feelings. Stress is not a sign of
weakness. On the contrary, dealing with stress appropriately is
a sign of maturity and health.
·
Make
time for fun and other pleasurable activities.
Don't pressure yourself to make too
many changes all at once. We all change at our own pace.
Click
here for info on (relatively affordable) stress reduction (relaxation
training) biofeedback devices which can be effective in helping
to alleviate stress.
If, after trying these suggestions,
you still feel excessively over-stressed or run down, you might
want to seek some professional advice.
More
on Signs of Stress
Over-stress reactions include a wide
range of symptoms, including physical, emotional, behavioral, and
cognitive signs.
Physical symptoms:
·
Stomach
ache, headache, dizziness, eye strain
·
Sleep
problems (too little or too much)
·
Problems
concentrating
Feelings:
·
Moodiness
(Feeling low or depressed)
·
Anxiety
(Tense, nervous, jumpy, unable to relax)
·
Irritable
or hostile (Getting angry over minor things)
·
Fearfulness
(Afraid to make decisions)
Behaviors:
·
Exaggerating
normal behavior (hard workers turn into workaholics; quiet people
become isolated)
·
Withdrawing
(from friends, family, and coworkers)
·
Working
harder (but getting less done)
·
Blaming
others (finding fault, being critical or hard to please)
·
Having
fewer stress-free conversations with family and friends
·
Having
fights (about everything and nothing)
·
Sharing
fewer satisfactions with family and friends
·
Having
other family members with stress problems (Stress is contagious.)
·
Pretending
that nothing is wrong (denial)
Thoughts:
·
This
is horrible/unbearable. I'm
not good enough.
·
I'm
going to go crazy.
·
I
can't go through with my wedding.
Again, it's important to recognize
that these are all signs of stress overload, probably not of more
a more serious condition.
Click
here for info on (relatively affordable) stress reduction (relaxation
training) biofeedback devices which can be effective in helping
to alleviate stress.
Now
that you're more relaxed, consider attending a Marriage Success
Training seminar with your partner. MST helps couples handle the
increased stress of the pre-wedding period in a much more healthy
way, so that they can use the pre-wedding experience to deepen their
intimacy--not stress their relationship-- during this special time.
Click here to learn about the benefits of MST.
Copyright
2003, Patricia S. & Gregory A. Kuhlman. You may copy this article
for non-commercial use provided that no changes are made and this
copyright notice, author credit and stayhitched.com source citation
are included.
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